Sprint Strikes Again

Sprint has zinged us yet AGAIN. In fact, I'll now be referring to them as ZingMobile. Sam enjoys playing with my cell phone. Last night after he had finished playing with it, I picked it up to see "Service Required, Please call 1-888-211-4727 for further assistance." I turned it on and off, but no dice. I used Pedro's phone to call Customer Service and shockingly, I got right through to someone. Note to self that 6:30pm EST is a good time to call. The lady from tech support suggested that I turn my phone off, take the battery out for 10 seconds to reset. Did it work? NOPE! Then tech support lady informs me that she'll have to transfer me to someone in Tech Support. Wait? I thought that's who I was talking with? What?
They transfered me to someone who was clearly from.....India! Shocker. (And let me say I have NO problem whatsoever with people from other countries, I just think its funny that India seems to be the go to country for Tech Support.)
India Lady: Yes, how can I help you with?
Me: My phone says "Service Required, Please call 1-888-211-4727 for further assistance." I've already turned it off and taken the battery out and that did nothing."
IL: Yes, I need you to power your phone off and take your battery out.
Me: I already did that.
IL: I need you to turn off your phone and take your battery out.
Me: Ugh, fine. (Loooooooong pause) Um? Can I put the battery back?
IL: No. Not yet. (two more minutes go by) Ok. Replace your battery.
I put the battery back and power up the phone and guess what? SAME MESSAGE!
Me: Didn't work.
IL: How old is your phone?
Me: Almost 3 years old.
IL: You need a new phone. You are eligible for an upgrade. You'll have to go to your closest repair center. Would you like me to find that for you.
Me: No. I know where that is. Thanks.

Now, right before Pedro and I got married, we consolidated to a family plan. Pedro switched from Nextel to Sprint. When we did that I had to cancel my old plan and sign up for a new family plan contract. My phone was JUST short of being 2 years old (so actually my phone is ALMOST four years old!) and I wasn't eligible for an upgrade yet, even though Pedro was getting a brand new phone and we were signing up for a brand new contract. I don't understand the logic, but this is ZingMobile that we're talking about here.
So the real zinger is that NOW I'm eligible for a phone upgrade, but Pedro isn't yet since his phone is 4 months short of the 2 year mark meaning I have to sign up for another 2 years of service to get my new phone and we'll probably go through this all over again in another 18 months when Pedro's phone dies. Good thing we have insurance on his phone. Although that annoys me too. Insurance is for cars, home and health. Cell phones should be covered under a company warranty just like other electronics and appliances. I don't have to take out insurance on my refrigerator.